There are days that I feel like I’m a character in a Frank Peretti novel. His descriptions of demons clinging onto people, steering them using their weaknesses are exactly what I’ve been feeling. The demon I’m dealing with is all a tangle of fangs and claws and deceit. He whispers doubts in my ears and opens doors to anger. He finds satisfaction in my anguish.
Prayer is my only defense. I utter pleas of release between washing dishes and changing diapers. I succumb to the viciousness of the demonic attacks in my laziness and complacency. I beg God and pray to Jesus to remove this unseemly character from my shoulders. And yet, I find that he is still there, lurking in my darkness, seeking each tiny opportunity to blow open any small crack to create gaping holes in the walls of my faith.
But listen here, demon. I’m not giving up. Your teeth might sink down to my bone and I might cry out in pain, but I will not give up. I will win this war; the battles may seem to go in your favor, but I have God on my side. Who do you have?
You have doubts? I have ambition.
You try to feed me despair; I drink in the saving blood of Jesus.
You serve up anger; and I will wipe it clean with forgiveness.
If you try again to defeat me with fear, I will come back with a sword of relentless faith.
For I know that with every step I take towards God, you will fight harder to win me back. But you are losing, demon. You will lose!
Lord, I know that You will answer all the prayers of those who truly believe in you and yet I’m still struggling with this demon, these character flaws, these weakness. If I’m to carry this burden, Lord, then I pray for the strength to do so with dignity. If I’m to always feel these shortcomings and fears, then I ask that these things make me stronger. All things are possible through You. Amen!!!
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